(Disclaimer: Long, boring, and semi graphic, especially if your are a male. I went back and forth on even sharing this intimate day with the world, but I had to document it before I forget! I think know my mind is already repressing the pain memories!!!)
The evening of Thursday, September 8th was an ambitious one for 9+ months pregnant me. I had a late afternoon 38 weeks doctor's apppointment.. After several weeks of progressing 1 cm per week, I was thrilled to find out I was 4 cm dilated. I was not so thrilled to find out that they could still not give me any indication when Baby Hogan would be making his/her debut.
So off I went to meet Marty at home and head to our friend Jen's 30th Birthday Celebration. As we walked into the bar, I kind of felt like that scene from "Sweet Home Alabama" in which Reese Witherspoon proclaims "YOU HAVE A BABY- AT A BAR." Except in my case, I was enormously pregnant, in 4 inch Christian Louboutins at a bar. A new, hip, hot spot bar. And an enormously pregnant me.
Last Prego Pic Before Heading to Jen's Birthday
I waddled to the balconette, plopped myself down, and conveyed to everyone I was convinced Baby Hogan would be arriving any day now for the following reasons 1) Friday, September 9th was my last day before maternity leave 2) Marty and I had dinner reservations for a hot date at Mark's for Friday night and 3) I had an indulgent spa day booked for Monday. This is in addition to the fact that I had fallen for every "induce labor" wives tale under the sun. From eating eggplant and pineapple every night for a week, to bouncing on my birth ball through multiple conference calls, drinking raspberry leaf tea like water, to popping evening primrose pills like they were going out of style- I had tried it all. No baby, and hardly any signs a baby was on it's way. And about a million people constantly reiterating "first babies are almost always late." Ughhh!
After a few hours of celebrating Jen and my ankles nearly doubling in size from our arrival, we headed out. We got home and ran through our evening routine just like normal- I tied up a few open work emails from the day and we were lights out by 10:30 pm.
At 3 am I woke for my first potty run of the evening (totally not abnormal, as I had been consistently making 3 am potty runs for the past several weeks). Two things however were slightly abnormal. First, as I rolled over, I could have sworn I felt or heard a small almost clicking/popping noise coming and second, our doggy George followed me into the bathroom and sat on the floor and whimpered as I went potty. This had NEVER happened before- normally the whole household slept right through my countless all night long potty runs. As I sat there, for some reason something felt different. I was having far stronger "Braxton Hicks" than I normally experienced. And I felt like I couldn't just go jump back in bed, so I turned on all of the lights and decided to get in the bath.
Once in the tub, I distracted myself by scrolling through Facebook on the iPhone. I had a sweet message from my friend Trish who was in Italy, and my following response to her still makes me laugh "I just woke up with the worst contraction I have ever had so far that literally made me cry!! Maybe the real thing, but not going to get my hopes up!!! I have been getting 1-2 big ones this week, but then they just go away! Sitting in bathtub at 3:15 AM....."
My how things quickly changed. It was around now I decided it was time to break in my contraction timer/counter application. I sat in that tub for about an hour as my contractions moved from about a minute long every 5 minutes to about 2 minutes long every 3 minutes. AND PAINFUL! At this point I decided it was probably time to wake up Marty. I waddled back into the bedroom to get him out of the bed and noticed some blood tinged water trickling down my leg, but still couldn't come to grips with the fact that this could be go time. And I certainly didn't want to cry labor wolf and head to the hospital to only be sent back home. I shook Marty and said "I think I am in labor." He was clearly deep in slumber and just rolled back over. So I turned on all of the lights and started to pack his bag. This snapped him into action and he ran downstairs to get the "What to do when Kristyn goes into labor checklist." Yes I am that OCD and weeks before made him a list.
As he began to make his way through his list, I decided to move my labor party into the shower. I could hardly stand up, so I grabbed my birth ball from my office and to the shower I went. I am
The pain started to get too intense for the shower and the next place I found myself was on the bathroom floor. It was now around 5 am, yet I still was not 100% convinced this was real labor. Crazy, I know. I decided to call our doula, Patti.
Our conversation went something like this:
Kristyn: Hi Patti, I am so sorry to wake you up so early, but I have been having contractions for the past hour that last about 2 minutes, every 3 minutes apart. And everytime I get a contraction I am throwing up. A lot. And I have some blood tinged water trickling out. And I think there may be some meconium in it (for those of you who don't know, meconium is a baby's first poo and is not supposed to come out until after the baby is out. If it shows up in the broken water/amniotic fluid, it could mean the baby is in distress).
Patti: Ok, I need you to head to the hospital right now. I will meet you there
Kristyn: Now? Really? Do you think I am in real labor?
Patti: Yes. Go now. By the way, how dilated were you at your last appointment?
Kristyn: I was 4 cm
Patti: KRISTYN, LEAVE NOW. I will be there when you arrive
Marty and I (well mostly Marty as I continued to rocked back and forth on all fours trying not to cry) wrapped up the loose ends left on "the list" and jumped in the car, looking at each other with great fear and great excitement thinking "WOW THIS IS REALLY IT." We were finally going to meet our sweet little baby. Surreal. I also could not believe how quickly things were happening.
We arrived at the hospital just before 6AM and over the course of our car ride the intensity of my contractions had increased, as had the intensity of the "water" that would escape with each contraction. I made my way out of the car and wondered to myself "HOW ON EARTH AM I GOING TO MAKE IT ALL OF THE WAY TO THE FIFTH FLOOR." I stopped at least 3-4 times on the way to the elevator to literally claw the wall in pain. The only way I could describe this pain is primal! It was so intense!
Once we made it to the 5th floor, I was so thankful we had Patti. She directed me to the check-in counter and told Marty I would have to go through check-in on my own. They keep the husband separate so they can ask you crazy questions such as "Is your husband emotionally/physically abusive." I mean really? I sat on a chair in check-in perched on basically a dog's potty pad with water gushing out from one end and a trash can in my lap full of vomit. The questions progressed to "Do you have a car seat?" "Do you mind if we review the hospital security policy with you to ensure your baby is not stolen?" I was seriously losing my patience. After what seemed like forever, they gave me a hospital gown and moved me to a triage room. Unfortunately 6:30 am is apparently a shift change time at the hospital, so after a nurse came in and checked me (5 1/2 cm) and strapped me into a fetal and contraction monitor, what seemed like hours started to tick by. Patti was still out in the waiting room watching our bags. Marty was probably just as scared as I was, because every time we would see an off the charts contraction flash across the screen, I would vomit and out would come meconium, blood, and tons of amniotic fluid. Despite being in excruciating pain, I was losing my patience. I kept asking Marty to please go grab a nurse. I was convinced they had forgotten we were there!
Finally around 7:15 another nurse arrived to check me again. First she checked, dilation- at this point I was 6 1/2 cm. Progressing fast! And once she noticed the meconium things FINALLY snapped into action. At last, around 7:30-7:45 I was moved to my room.
Once I moved to my room, Patti joined us and asked me "Do you want to get on the epidural list." I had always been semi set on trying the Au natural route, but this pain was more than excruciating. I waffled back and forth and she told me- even if you say yes now, it could be at least an hour before they arrive depending on the wait list. I quickly decided, "Fine, put me on the list, but under no circumstances do I want any other pain meds/narcotics, etc" Good thing, because it was indeed another hour until the anesthesiologist arrived. In the meantime, around 8 am, the real labor and delivery nurse came and checked me. 7 cm. She and Patti told me they thought we would meet our baby by 10 am!!! Wow!
Post-epidural. Even had the opportunity to change into my cute monogrammed hospital gown and thrown on some lip gloss :)
Once the anesthesiologist arrived around 8:30 am to insert the epidural, Marty and Patti used the opportunity to sneak down to the cafeteria to grab breakfast and call our parents. One side note on the epidural- if any of your are scared of needles or scared of epidurals in general, I FELT NOTHING! But within 10 minutes, I felt like a NEW WOMAN- No more pain. All of a sudden labor became fun! And as soon as the epidural was inserted and they checked me again I was 8 1/2 cm!
Patti sprung into action working her massage magic to get baby in an optimal position for an easy birth, getting some soothing music playing in the background, and spraying aromatherapy scents throughout the room. I munched on Chex Mix and sipped Gatorade. Soon my Mom arrived, followed shortly thereafter by my Dad. Marty's parents had been in Michigan and were not scheduled to arrive home until Sunday, so they got on the standby list to make it home in time for Baby's debut. After the epidural, I felt so relaxed and felt so much love in that labor and deliver room! I could hardly believe the pre-epidural and post-epidural shift! And if you ask my dad, I kept telling this to anyone would listen, over, and over, and over, and OVER! "I LOVE EPIDURALS!" And I LOVE PATTI the Doula!
Somewhere around 12:00 (I clearly had blown past that "you'll have a baby by 10 am" prediction), my real doctor walked over on her lunch break to check me. I was at 9 cm, but semi stalled and upon further inspection it was discovered that Baby Hogan was what they call "sunny side up." Meaning his face was facing up instead of down towards my back how it was supposed to be. Only because I had received the epidural, my doctor was able to attempt to spin baby into proper position. Graphic details- she literally takes her hand (really entire arm), reaches in, and manually turns the baby an entire 180 degrees. I definitely felt some pressure and can not even imagine how anyone could go through this feeling the real enchilada. I don't even know if they would attempt it. The good news is this was apparently the culprit for the stall out at 9 cm. After they flipped him, they told me I would be pushing any minute now. My doctor was going to head back to the office and she would be back shortly for pushing to commence!
At 1pm, with still no progress, they decided to give me Pitocin to speed things along. Like the epidural, this was something I was also initially against. As you begin to stack on the intervention s, c section rates drastically increase and a c section is and always has been my worst nightmare. Particularly since I made it through my whole pregnancy with placenta previa (a low lying placenta that often leads to a section), however it moved up just barely enough in the knick of time so they were ok with my attempting the vaginal birth.
After the Pitocin was administered, the nurse came and checked me again, only to discover 1) I was still at 9cm and 2) Baby had done a 180 again and was sunny side up. This is fairly rare, as often times when babies flip, their heart rate drops, they go into distress, and you guessed it- cue c section. Our little baby had made a another complete flip with no blips on the fetal monitor. As the nurse was explaining things, she somehow uttered "c-section" and this snapped me into attention. I looked at our doula Patti and said "I will do whatever it takes to avoid a c-section. Put me on all fours (I had read this could do the trick), hang me from the ceiling, have me attempt cart wheels, ANYTHING, I do not want a c-section." So with Patti and Marty's help, I moved to all fours in my little hospital bed and Patti worked her magic at trying to get our little Baby to spin. I could definitely feel something move inside, and I was convinced it had worked. When the nurse came back to check on things, I had moved to 9 1/2 cm, and our baby had at least spun sideways. Not a perfect situation, but at least something to work with. She ran out to call the doctor and came back in and informed me that our doctor would be walking over, and wanted me to go ahead and start "practice pushing" even though I was not yet at a 10. Doctor would also try again to get the baby from sideways, BACK to face down.
Let me tell you- pushing is HARD. Like not "this hurts hard," but hard like I have run half marathon and pushing our baby out took far greater endurance and effort. Hard like 2 weeks later my body still aches (especially my arms and legs) not from the baby coming out, but from how hard you work pushing. I had started pushing at 3:00 pm. Our Doctor arrived at 3:15 and began giving me some pushing tips. After each round of pushes the room would fill with words of encouragement and "great job." For some reason I thought the pushing wasn't working, so little competitive me looked at the doctor and said "Can I ask a favor- if I do a bad push, don't tell me it was great, tell me it was bad, so I don't do it that same way again." We finally started to get into a rhythm and apparently this is when comedian Kristyn decided to make a cameo uttering such comments as "I feel like I am an actress in a movie and I am just playing a part and this is not really me." Around this time, I asked for the mirror! Another thing I didn't think I would be brave enough to do! Wow! That was definitely some pushing motivation. Towards the end of pushing, our doctor was finally able to rotate baby one more time into the right position for delivery. Everyone seemed to be amazed that our baby had spun 3 full times with no fetal distress! I was so happy and also thrilled I was getting close to pushing baby all the way out!
The last little bit of pushing was a whirlwind and nothing short of a miracle in my book. I can tell you as our baby's head emerged I felt such a surge of love (and relief) and what I know in my heart had to be the presence of God. Our doctor maneuvered baby halfway out and then pointed the baby in Marty's direction and said "Daddy, do you want to tell us what it is?" Through his tears, Marty exclaimed BOY! I have never seen Marty look more happy in my entire life and honestly never loved him more either! They asked me what baby's name was and I hesitated (for a split second almost changing my mind to Martin Thomas Hogan IV), but then exclaimed our agreed upon choice: Henry Martin Hogan! Our beautiful baby boy made his entrance into this world after a fairly quick 13 hours of labor at 4:15 pm on Friday, September 9th.
Because of the meconium that was present during labor, I had Henry on my chest for a quick minute before he had to be whisked to the little room adjoining ours to have his lungs suctioned to make certain there was no meconium trapped in there. Another thing not part of my plan, but the one thing I had learned more than ever this day is that NOTHING will go according to plan. Words of advice to future mommas- Throw the "Birth Plan" out the window.
Marty went with Henry and my mom went off to the waiting room to tell my Dad and step mom we had a baby and he was a BOY!
As soon as the placenta was delivered, the mood in the room subtly shifted. It went from calm, to frantic with people rushing around. Our doctor looked up at me and calmly said "You are having more bleeding than I am comfortable with." I knew a postpartum hemorrhage was a strong possibility given my placenta previa, but it was kind of scary as people shuffled around the room calling for an injection of Methergine NOW. Next thing I knew, a big shot was jammed in my thigh and several people began pushing so hard on my stomach. I will refrain from the graphic details, but after two Methergine shots, lots of uterine massage (I have no idea why the call it "massage" because it hurt more than all of labor), and 620 ml of blood lost, I was finally stabilized and escaped a yucky transfusion! Thank goodness!
After all of this drama passed, Henry was cleaned up and brought over to me before he had to be taken to the nursery for further double checking just to make sure everything was A-OK! I could write another miles long post and still not adequately describe the connection I felt between Henry, Marty, and really the whole world. It was so surreal. After too short of a time, they took Henry off to the nursery, where my Dad stood guard like a hawk and watched our little guy in there for the entire 3 hours he was away. Around 7:30, Henry was finally brought back to our arms and our family was complete! 5 hours of pain med free labor, 8 hours of epidural, 3 180 degree spins, and episiotomy, postpartum hemorrhage later, and one set of parents making a cross country flight arriving in the nick of time, we met the love of our life! I would do it all again tomorrow!
Somewhere around 12:00 (I clearly had blown past that "you'll have a baby by 10 am" prediction), my real doctor walked over on her lunch break to check me. I was at 9 cm, but semi stalled and upon further inspection it was discovered that Baby Hogan was what they call "sunny side up." Meaning his face was facing up instead of down towards my back how it was supposed to be. Only because I had received the epidural, my doctor was able to attempt to spin baby into proper position. Graphic details- she literally takes her hand (really entire arm), reaches in, and manually turns the baby an entire 180 degrees. I definitely felt some pressure and can not even imagine how anyone could go through this feeling the real enchilada. I don't even know if they would attempt it. The good news is this was apparently the culprit for the stall out at 9 cm. After they flipped him, they told me I would be pushing any minute now. My doctor was going to head back to the office and she would be back shortly for pushing to commence!
At 1pm, with still no progress, they decided to give me Pitocin to speed things along. Like the epidural, this was something I was also initially against. As you begin to stack on the intervention s, c section rates drastically increase and a c section is and always has been my worst nightmare. Particularly since I made it through my whole pregnancy with placenta previa (a low lying placenta that often leads to a section), however it moved up just barely enough in the knick of time so they were ok with my attempting the vaginal birth.
After the Pitocin was administered, the nurse came and checked me again, only to discover 1) I was still at 9cm and 2) Baby had done a 180 again and was sunny side up. This is fairly rare, as often times when babies flip, their heart rate drops, they go into distress, and you guessed it- cue c section. Our little baby had made a another complete flip with no blips on the fetal monitor. As the nurse was explaining things, she somehow uttered "c-section" and this snapped me into attention. I looked at our doula Patti and said "I will do whatever it takes to avoid a c-section. Put me on all fours (I had read this could do the trick), hang me from the ceiling, have me attempt cart wheels, ANYTHING, I do not want a c-section." So with Patti and Marty's help, I moved to all fours in my little hospital bed and Patti worked her magic at trying to get our little Baby to spin. I could definitely feel something move inside, and I was convinced it had worked. When the nurse came back to check on things, I had moved to 9 1/2 cm, and our baby had at least spun sideways. Not a perfect situation, but at least something to work with. She ran out to call the doctor and came back in and informed me that our doctor would be walking over, and wanted me to go ahead and start "practice pushing" even though I was not yet at a 10. Doctor would also try again to get the baby from sideways, BACK to face down.
Let me tell you- pushing is HARD. Like not "this hurts hard," but hard like I have run half marathon and pushing our baby out took far greater endurance and effort. Hard like 2 weeks later my body still aches (especially my arms and legs) not from the baby coming out, but from how hard you work pushing. I had started pushing at 3:00 pm. Our Doctor arrived at 3:15 and began giving me some pushing tips. After each round of pushes the room would fill with words of encouragement and "great job." For some reason I thought the pushing wasn't working, so little competitive me looked at the doctor and said "Can I ask a favor- if I do a bad push, don't tell me it was great, tell me it was bad, so I don't do it that same way again." We finally started to get into a rhythm and apparently this is when comedian Kristyn decided to make a cameo uttering such comments as "I feel like I am an actress in a movie and I am just playing a part and this is not really me." Around this time, I asked for the mirror! Another thing I didn't think I would be brave enough to do! Wow! That was definitely some pushing motivation. Towards the end of pushing, our doctor was finally able to rotate baby one more time into the right position for delivery. Everyone seemed to be amazed that our baby had spun 3 full times with no fetal distress! I was so happy and also thrilled I was getting close to pushing baby all the way out!
The last little bit of pushing was a whirlwind and nothing short of a miracle in my book. I can tell you as our baby's head emerged I felt such a surge of love (and relief) and what I know in my heart had to be the presence of God. Our doctor maneuvered baby halfway out and then pointed the baby in Marty's direction and said "Daddy, do you want to tell us what it is?" Through his tears, Marty exclaimed BOY! I have never seen Marty look more happy in my entire life and honestly never loved him more either! They asked me what baby's name was and I hesitated (for a split second almost changing my mind to Martin Thomas Hogan IV), but then exclaimed our agreed upon choice: Henry Martin Hogan! Our beautiful baby boy made his entrance into this world after a fairly quick 13 hours of labor at 4:15 pm on Friday, September 9th.
Because of the meconium that was present during labor, I had Henry on my chest for a quick minute before he had to be whisked to the little room adjoining ours to have his lungs suctioned to make certain there was no meconium trapped in there. Another thing not part of my plan, but the one thing I had learned more than ever this day is that NOTHING will go according to plan. Words of advice to future mommas- Throw the "Birth Plan" out the window.
Marty went with Henry and my mom went off to the waiting room to tell my Dad and step mom we had a baby and he was a BOY!
As soon as the placenta was delivered, the mood in the room subtly shifted. It went from calm, to frantic with people rushing around. Our doctor looked up at me and calmly said "You are having more bleeding than I am comfortable with." I knew a postpartum hemorrhage was a strong possibility given my placenta previa, but it was kind of scary as people shuffled around the room calling for an injection of Methergine NOW. Next thing I knew, a big shot was jammed in my thigh and several people began pushing so hard on my stomach. I will refrain from the graphic details, but after two Methergine shots, lots of uterine massage (I have no idea why the call it "massage" because it hurt more than all of labor), and 620 ml of blood lost, I was finally stabilized and escaped a yucky transfusion! Thank goodness!
After all of this drama passed, Henry was cleaned up and brought over to me before he had to be taken to the nursery for further double checking just to make sure everything was A-OK! I could write another miles long post and still not adequately describe the connection I felt between Henry, Marty, and really the whole world. It was so surreal. After too short of a time, they took Henry off to the nursery, where my Dad stood guard like a hawk and watched our little guy in there for the entire 3 hours he was away. Around 7:30, Henry was finally brought back to our arms and our family was complete! 5 hours of pain med free labor, 8 hours of epidural, 3 180 degree spins, and episiotomy, postpartum hemorrhage later, and one set of parents making a cross country flight arriving in the nick of time, we met the love of our life! I would do it all again tomorrow!
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Love it!!! This is the story I've been wanting to hear for such a long time. Welcome to the world Henry! Maybe he has a future career in break dancing or something with all of those spins in utero!
ReplyDeleteIt is funny how similar we are. With Emma, I was not convinced. I needed to shave my legs and I had a pedi planned for that day. I was shaving in the shower and would try to hide the fact I was having a contraction. Luckily, we left when we did. After arriving, I had her only 4 hours later. So much for planning. It never works out as planned.
ReplyDelete